I am Stress

I feel ok until 3 hours ago where i suddenly feel tense all over my body. Suddenly, I realized that, I do not have much time left for me to prepare for my final exam. 5 subjects, 10 days left. I hate it to study last minute. It is very suffering... but what choice do i have? This semester is really a tough one. The 14-week of studying passed by as fast as lightning. With just a glance, study week is coming. During this whole semester, I was busy with assignments, mid-term tests and other assessments. I hardly have time for breathing... Life is tough and it become even tougher now.

I really need to find back the motivation to keep me going. Some says, chocolate can help to make you feel calm. Some suggest to take a long shower to relax. But what I did? Blogging here to release my stress. Hope tomorrow will be better. I can't afford to waste any time as I am already lacking one.

Stupid Me

I am really regret of what i have just did. I really shouldn't be influence by my own feeling. Why I did the thing I did? It hurts me even deeper. That is the last thing that i need now. Since the day that I made that decision, I should be very clear of the consequences. Why i still holding on? It is time to let go. Time to say goodbye and start anew. Just like the old saying goes, let bygones be bygones.

I can't always sit here and wait for miracle to happen. Waiting for miracle is just like waiting for RAIN during draught season. I'm tired of waiting. I don't believe in miracle and I don't want to believe in it anymore. It is very disappointed when you are hoping for miracle and eventually it never happen. I am like putting my future in the hand of other. Hoping that the other person can create a better future for you.

Things started off very smoothly. Miracles did happened one after another... And I slowly change to be more and more dependent. Until I have turned into someone that i couldn't recognise anymore. I hated it so much. I can't stand it anymore.

I swore to myself that I will let go of everything. No more turning back. I have chose my own way. Be firm with this decision... Hopefully, it will leads me to the place that I wanted to...

My Way

I always thought that I could never face this alone. Perhaps, I'm too used to depend on another people. I don't know where do I find the courage to finally say no. From that moment, I decided to choose another path of life which will lead me to a very different ending. I don't know is this the correct way. I don't know will i regret someday. What I am sure is that, I know exactly what I am doing now.

I know that I am being selfish. In order to get what I want, I have hurt the person that I care the most. I'm really very sorry for that. I wanted to apologize but I do not know how to face him. I have the courage to choose this way but yet I do not have the courage to ask for forgiveness. There is nothing I can do now except to move forward and never look back. Hopefully, time will heals everything.

Look Out Point

I always like to go to nice places. And i thought that Kl is all about concrete buildings, lights, cars and lot and lot of people. It is until i went to this place with a magnificent view which melt my heart. Look Out Point!!!


Credit to photographer Lee Chung Lern

Now i feel that KL is actually a very nice city. The cool breeze gently caressing ur face... The feeling is so right. I feel rejuvenated again... haha.

i'm having a good time with my friends.



Now i feel that, everything do have it's own good point, but it depend greatly from which angle you look at it. The big city that I thought is crowded with so many concrete stuff is actually look so nice from a high place. This concept applies to all.

Migraine

There is no need for me to explain more. Everyone in my class (or perhap in my uni) are complaining that there are so busy. Same thing apply to me. But there is 1 more thing that no one experience it. It is to have MIGRAINE while you are so busy with all your stuff. There is never ending assignment and midterm. piles of homework and tutorial. not to mention revision....cuz i hardly have time to revise.

There are times that i hated it so much why i am born with easily having migraine. whenever i am stress, sad or angry, expose to strong light or hot weather, my 'friend' will come and visit me, uninvitedly. it is not my choice. and i don't know is there anyway to cure it.

So, sometimes i might seems like i'm very weak. Whenever migraine, i can't do anything. There are times that during exam period or assignment due date I need to force myself to do work even though my mind feels like wanna explode any minute.

Why only assignment and exam can make me so stress???? how am i going to face working life in the future? I always like challenging job. I don't want a job which is like routine and can bored me to death. But how am i going to survive? I really don't want to break down so easily and let other people think that i am so weak.

For those of you who are fortunate to have a good stamina, be happy with that. But at the same time, don't look down at people like me. haha....

I AM DISAPPOINTED

Ok, i thought that we worked well in a team. Everything work smoothly for the past 1 year. In fact, I am happy with my team. I thought that everyone play a very important role in accomplishing our assignment. What i like about my team is that, everyone is serious about the assignment. We wouldn't mind who do more work or who contribute lesser. This is because, each of us is understanding. Let say, if A did not contribute much in this assignment, then she will contribute more in another assignment. At the end of the day, we get the job done. And the job is in a good quality (at least, we are happy with our work).

However, I could never imagine that, there is this 1 person in my team who think differently. He blabbed out everything when I raise the issue that he is not treating the rest of us the way he used to. He think that he contribute more than anyone of us and that we are not serious with our work. Well, it's sad to know that. Especially, when that people is someone who i can call him my buddy. WTH is going on here? He even scolded me in the cafe and threw file on the table when he voice out his dissatisfaction. OK, i really can't stand it when ppl scold me. Hey, c'mon. My dad didn't even scold me, so who are you to scold me?

Everything is ruin now. The team that i am so happy with is now gone. Things will never be the same anymore. There's one thing that I learnt now. Time will reveal the true color of a person. In my perception, when there is a crack, nothing can mend it. No matter what happen, once i got disappointed with someone, that's the end of the story already.

River of Memories

I've been real busy recently. With my competition in Utar, and my final exam is coming... There are some friends that I didn't meet them for more than 6 months. As if I had disappeared for such a long time. Not only me alone is busy. They are busy too... well, this is life. Isn't it? At least i think it that way.

However, I am free now. Enjoying my 1 week holiday before going back to KL for my part time job. I have just browsed tru some friend's profile in Frienster. I realised that i am too busy to care for my friends. So many of them have changed so so much. I remember the last day of school, we all promised to keep in touch. But in reality? that seldom happen. Maybe meet once or twice in a year?
I truly agree that secondary school life is simply the best. I miss all my friends. Every morning during our break time, we all will hang out at "dewan", talking and teasing each other. I guess it's kinda hard for us to do that again. probably, never will happen again. The last song that we all sang together during our last day of school,"Through the school gate in the morning......" had separated us all now.
Even tough we still keep in touch with each other, but things will never be the same again. I really miss those time. Too bad, i can't turn the clock around. All i can do is just to sit back and think back all the memories that i've been tru with all my friends. Sometimes i will laugh, sometimes it bring tears to my eyes. No matter what, life still goes on...

The Apprentice 2nd Task

Ok, so there is no elimination for the first round. That's mean, now there are 12 teams competing each other. Our next task is to come out with a report, design a printed advertisement and make a 1 min TV commercial for Barista Coffee. Thing doesn't go on that smooth this time. There will be 2 teams to be eliminated. okay, frankly speaking... Our motivation had gone down the river. and as the result...we lose too. and the lucky part is that, we did not eliminate from the competition.

this is the printed advertisement


I would like to express a special thanks to the person who "assist" us...